The following is an excerpt from OpinionJournal.com’s “Best of the Web” written by the editor, James Taranto.

This Is Why We Can’t Have Nice Things 
“Nine Injured After Fan Trouble in Nice Stadium”–headline, Reuters, Nov. 24

dog-ratIt’s Always in the Last Place You Look 
“In Manhattan Alleys, Dogs on Rat Hunts Find Bags of Fun”–headline, New York Times, Nov. 22

Bottom Story of the Day 
“Exclusive: Mitch McConnell Did Not Criticize Tea Party in Conference Call to Donors”–headline, Washington Examiner, Nov. 22

Who’s the Dummy? 
Here’s a curious story from Detroit’s WDIV-TV:

They stand guard at his home 24 hours a day, seven days a week.

At first, and even second glance, you don’t know if they’re real or not.

A man on Detroit’s west side is so serious about home security, he’s using CPR dummies to help him.

The dummies are dressed as gang members .

They stand and sit by his front door in an enclosed porch and you can’t miss them.

“I saw someone on the east side doing this and now I’m doing it. The police stop, look, knock and tell me what a good idea this is,” the man told Local 4.

He won’t reveal his name and only agreed to share his security secrets if we don’t share what street he lives on.

The accompanying video does, however, reveal what the house and the dummies look like. Presumably neighborhood crooks would recognize it. The homeowner must be counting on them never to have stolen a TV set.

[From the Nov. 25 BOTW Archives.] For more “Best of the Web” click here and look for the “Best of the Web Today” link in the middle column below “Today’s Columnists.”