The following is an excerpt from OpinionJournal.com’s “Best of the Web” written by the editor, James Taranto.

Shouldn’t All Their Cars Be Able to Do That?
“GM Recalls 60,000 2013 Vehicles That Could Roll Away”–headline, Detroit News, Jan. 4

Bottom Stories of the Day

  • “Lindsay Lohan Not Evicted From Beverly Hills Home, Source Says”–headline, FoxNews.com, Jan. 2
  • “New Airline Not Coming to Macon”–headline, Telegraph (Macon, Ga.), Jan. 3
  • “Finally: Team O Launches Inaugural Souvenir Store”–headline, HotAir.com, Jan. 3

Back to the Future
The next time someone complains that lawmakers never do anything, direct him to this Chicago Tribune dispatch from Springfield, the state capital:

The Illinois Senate left the State Capitol later today without voting on measures to legalize gay marriage and outlaw assault weapons, leaving the fate of those controversial issues in doubt.

They didn’t pass any new laws, which is probably just as well, but [can you believe they] discovered the secret to time travel?

For more “Best of the Web” click here and look for the “Best of the Web Today” link in the middle column below “Today’s Columnists.”